To All The Undecided and On-Limbo Grads

I once had the distinct pleasure of being served by a waiter who was quite passionate about what he chose to do for a living. Rare, right? Usually people get into waitering/waitressing because it is one of the easiest jobs to get. Just look up most Hollywood stars and most of them, at one point or another, had done some waitressing to pay the bills and tide them over before their big break into celebritydom. No one grows up wanting to be a waiter or waitress. It is not in the list of ambitions our parents fed us to want to be. But this guy, he loved what he did for a living and it showed. If you ask him what is good on the menu, he will give you a detailed albeit not boring list of reasons why you should choose the pasta over the steak that particular day. He always served you with a smile. He seemed genuinely happy to see you walk in. He remembers what you like and what you don’t like and will anticipate it as soon as you arrive. He remembered one time I didn’t like onions in my salad and when he took my order he asked me if he should ask the chef to hold the onions. And this treatment wasn’t specific to me because I am a girl or some sort of personality, I saw him with other customers and he was just as enthusiastic about making sure they had a pleasurable time with their meals.

After another good meal, I started to chat him up. He was very friendly and warm and I was entertained with his conversation. Something that is again…rare. He excused himself with ease if another customer needed him for something. And then he’d come back and pick up the conversation where you left off. It was such a pleasure to be waited on by someone who had the heart of a servant, and who actually liked being a waiter. He wasn’t just someone who took your order, told the chef what you wanted, and presented you the bill when you were done eating. He took pleasure in waiting on you while you enjoyed the food he served. He wanted you to have a great time in their restaurant. The man went well beyond his duties as a server. As such, the  brief, daily, cursory obligation that was lunch or dinner took on to mean so much more than just meal.  It was a really great time!

That experience made me acutely aware that it hardly matters what you do for a living or what you choose for a career in this world, as long as it is something you can throw yourself into and enjoy. Yes, of course we want high paying jobs. Yes, of course we want to achieve success with the  financial gains that come along with it. And yes, we want to have a certain amount of distinction for what we have chosen for a career. But, it is my belief, that in the great scheme of things, what we do is not the point of having a career or a job. The point is to throw yourself into something and get to know life better and enjoy life through what you have chosen to do. And knowing life better is really about knowing ourselves better.

I don’t want to pontificate. I just want to write this for all the graduates who are in the crossroads of their life…for those who are still undecided on what to do with the rest of their lives EVEN with a degree in hand. Maybe these thoughts help…

When I graduated from my four-year course in university, I remember asking: “Four years of education, but what exactly am I good for?” and “Diploma accomplished. Now what?” Well, whatever it is that you will end up choosing… or whatever gets forced upon you by life and circumstance, the hope is that it will be a career that will bring you happiness, fulfillment, financial gain, and the distinction we all want at the end of the day.

Let me end this post with a quote from the movie “Without Limits” that starred Billy Crudup (Prefontaine) and Donald Sutherland (Bill Bowerman, founder of Nike). The movie is based on the life of runner Steve Prefontaine and his relationship with his coach. Enjoy!

“Men of Oregon, I invite you to become students of your events. Running, one might say, is basically an absurd pastime upon which to be exhausting ourselves. But if you can find meaning in the kind of running you have to do to stay on this team…chances are you can find meaning in another absurd pastime: Life.”

Bill Bowerman